Sony and I haven’t been buddies, or even civil to each other, since they started making me lean into the punch. I’ve tried ducking, sometimes successfully, but time and again I keep taking it on the chin.
The punches I dread the most are their Demon Expansions, the Sony Left Hook. You know the type … buy the expansion and maybe some day you will unlock the content therein, m’lords and m’ladies. Fuck you.
Many in the gaming world have heard by now about their latest Demon Scam. Summary for those in the cheap seats: Sony has delayed the long-awaited revamp of the Star Wars Galaxies (SWG) combat and PVP system so they can release the first Demon Expansion, The Jump to Lightspeed, in time for those crucial Christmas sales.
Naturally, this caused mayhem and hysteria among the populace, cuz, umm, after all, a COMBAT SYSTEM is kind of critical in a game designed around a CIVIL WAR. Idiots.
Lest ye think me slow witted, I understand the business reasons for this decision. I know all about business and having to make a buck; despite my penchant for online gaming, I have to make a buck too. I’m just kind of old-fashioned since I believe the guy paying me a buck should be getting some value for his buck. Call me a crazy American.
I kinda saw this one coming from a long way down the tracks. I even dreaded the combat rebalance — Sony and I having that long history together, I just KNOW they’ll fuck us over, and often. Still, I feel bad for the new gamers. They took it on the chin.
By some guy’s count (maybe a catasser named Josh, who knows), Sony lost over 1,000 subscriptions after yesterday’s announcement. They’ve been bleeding subscriptions for months now, maybe they’ll take note and have the PR Department produce some sort of missive to calm the masses.
In a disturbing way, it’s enjoyable to watch the fallout from this mess. Sony’s Vortex of Evil knows no bounds. (You heard it here first.)
TO BE CONTINUED — PART II — Sony thinks I’m stupid enough to sign up to beta test their Demon Expansion. (Hint: They can shove it up their collective asses.)
Monthly Archives: July 2004
Way Back When
Back when I was AOL user #24, hoping user #25 would come along some day, I ran into AOL’s gaming area and tried out a little PVP shooter named Rolemaster: Magestorm (MS). By today’s standards, this ancient shooter was as primitive as using chopsticks to eat soup. In it’s day though, it was the shit.
The Setup: Three teams, Chaos (red), Balance (green) and Order (blue) each of which has a home area that must be conquered/defended within one of three different maps available — The Cathedral (our overwhelming favorite), Catacombs, or the dreaded Thunderkeep (notoriously difficult to defend).
Wanna hear scary? I remembered all of that and it’s been over five years since I’ve played.
O those were the days! PVP was new, graphical gaming was new, hacking game code just for the hell of it was new. We invented cyber, baby! The scams, griefs and backstabbing that you are so familiar with in online society today — that was us.
I remember several times when this one guy would take over control of the game and change everyone’s player name. (Mike the hacker we called him. He was the god of turning an MS night into a night of chaos and anarchy.)
One weekend, they patched in what became known as “The Hacker Patch”. Basically, the patch compared a player’s set of trained spells with their earned experience points and deleted any players whose training was mathematically impossible. (Why in the world they didn’t have this in the original code, I dunno. Devs were new too in those days.)
The next week, many of the players we used to play with were gone. I was vindicated, however, as a couple of asshats had been accusing me (!!!) of cheating. Maybe I had just been clever enough to restore my original spell set before the patch.
The world will never know. That one goes to the grave with me.
Site Taglines, Sep 06 – Present
The comprehensive list of the taglines used on this site from September 2006 through today, in reverse chronological order, including artist/author credits and album art:
10/01/07 – present — I know all your guild’s secrets. (Well, I do.)
09/14/07 – 09/29/07 — I know something about opening windows and doors. (“Intruder” by Peter Gabriel.)
07/15/07 – 09/13/07 — There and back again. (Bilbo and Frodo Baggins’ memoirs, as described in The Hobbit and The Lord of the Rings, respectively.)
02/03/07 – 07/14/07 — Writing something nasty on the wall. (“I Wish” by Stevie Wonder.)
01/12/07 – 02/02/07 — The agony and the irony, they’re killing me. (“Flagpole Sitta” by Harvey Danger.)
12/22/06 – 01/11/07 — doesn’t look a thing like Jesus. (“When You Were Young” by The Killers.)
10/01/06 – 12/21/06 — Let the games begin. (Lord Victor Nefarius, World of Warcraft despot.)
09/08/06 – 09/30/06 — This is how I would want to go. (“Summer’s Cauldron” by XTC.)
09/01/06 – 09/07/06 — They live inside of my head. (“Dream Police” by Cheap Trick.)