Gaming message boards are, almost without exception, a complete waste of time. You might find a nugget of useful information there, but you’ll have to wade through complaints, false accusations and incomprehensible l337 d3wd sp34k and chest thumping to find anything worthwhile. As far as I’ve been able to tell, message board communities are for mocking other players and wasting (what would otherwise be) productive work or school hours.
It’s been my observation that over 90 percent of posters can be categorized into one of the following profiles:
The Attention Ho – Look at me! Look what I’m doing now! Respond to my thread! Definintely, the most prolific posters around — every minor victory, every inconsequential slight and every excrutiating minutae of their virtual and real lives is documented in great detail. (The attention ho will also usually dabble in incredibly bad roleplay fan fiction.) JFC, wipe the cheeto dust off your fingers and realize that no one gives a fuck what you’re doing.
The Drama Queen – O M G, I’m quitting the game! O M G, Soandso stole my noob mob! O M G, you will NOT believe how mean PowerGamer04 was to me! O M G stfu! Not only am I not surprised that you’re the game’s whipping boy, I wish that I had been the one doing the whipping. And btw, fucking quit already — I just know you’re going to return to the boards FOR MONTHS to annoy us all.
The Moral Barometer – These types chime in on every single thread involving any sort of game dispute, no matter how minor, with their self-important judgmental bullshit. Get a clue Judge Judy, only the ho’s and queens bring their disputes to message boards. Everyone else, and this is SHOCKING, settles their disputes in private rather than parade them on the internet.
Post Count Ho – This buttmuncher is just farming post count totals, because that statistic alone proves how super popular they are (on the internet). They bump all the ho’s and queens’ threads, they bump every single auction of in-game items … no matter how STUPID the auction is … they bump all their guildmates’ threads (*bump* for my homey in the guild!), and some will resort to necro-bumping (resurrecting old, ancient threads) just to enhance their leet post count. FYI, dumass, *bump* is not content and post counts don’t translate to dick size.
The Ghet-TOE Banger – Their board shit is peppered with alot of lingo, PROVING that they are not an internet nerd, but rather an incredibly cool person IRL that just stumbled onto the message board. (ya, right) They do a lot of posturing about their posses, their biatches, yo yo, werd bro, runnin wit da guildies to fuck shit up. Get over yourself, yo!
The best way to deal with all these assclowns is to just stay away from gaming message boards. Sure, it’s tempting to open Pandora’s Box just a tiny bit and peek inside, but once you do, you’ll want to rip your eyeballs out and stomp on them. And trust me on this, you won’t find any useful information there, so just google what you seek far, far away.
Even 23,980,590 pop-up ads are better than that shit.